Week 1: The Rules

The Rules

  • You have to be young.
  • You have to already be famous.
  • You have to be in New York.
  • You have to be in the Theatre.
  • You have to be in the Academy.
  • You have to be connected.
  • You have to have a band.
  • You have to know Stephen Colbert.
  • You have to have a budget.
  • You have to be someone else.
  • You have to have played at Largo.

The rule I most want to break is the one that says I have to do it by myself. Some people surround themselves with collaborators, and I do that, but at the core it's just me, I'll do it, I got it, don't worry about me, I'm fine.


I know where it comes from. I know -- I can see it throughout my life.

But if you release a record, do a radio promotion , do a press campaign, and book and perform a tour, something is going to suffer. I've learned this the hard way.

It's about letting go. It's about trust. I can let go!

It's about unblurring my eyes and seeing in the periphery the ways I can be supported.

Well, part of it is being female. The people I'm currently idolizing all have wives, wives who run things or manage things. And my hubby is so supportive. So I think it might be more in my brain than in the real world. It might be a -- what's it called? Like an appendix? -- vestigial organ, like: I can't expect too much, or I've got to handle it, or "Don't worry, I'll do it."

So what does it look like to break this rule? What does it look like to build a production team? I guess that's the real question. I know how to collaborate on the art itself. A production team. I had one when we did Cinderblock Bookshelves, but how do you do it again? How do you do it more?

I remember when I was working for Rickie Lee Jones and I saw a note? a Post It? something from publicist Liz Rosenberg (who went on to become Madonna's publicist, for crying out loud) that said "Rest up, doll, you've got a big job ahead." Ooooh, how I want that. Even though I've seen it doesn't last.

The indie music business is not known for providing artists with a soft nest. No part of the music business was ever known for it.

I want a wife. Or a mom. I want a wife or a mom.

Sigh. Okay, rant over. Here we go.





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